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Serving
One God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit;
Supporting Christians in their desire to experience Christ and glorify Him; Sharing with seekers who desire to know God. |
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Sandy with baby, Nancy, Cleatta, and Marsha |
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Nancy's
Columns
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Learning to Listen During my early adult years, I thought that my role in friendships was to solve problems for other people. I was so certain of this that I often interrupted people before they could finish speaking. Friends, usually women, were honest enough with me to tell me the truth about how my well intended “solutions” affected them. Instead of building relationships and helping people, I actually cut off communication and sometimes lost friends that I wanted to keep. As I grew, I realized several things. First, I really did not know enough in most cases to actually solve the problem. There were often factors operating in the background I was unaware of. Second, what most people wanted was someone to listen to them. Sometimes they just wanted to tell me what had happened. Occasionally they wanted someone to sympathize with them. Sometimes the way my friends solved their own problems was to talk through the problem and possible solutions out loud. As a person who enjoys solving problems just listening was often frustrating to me. I wanted to do something, to make things better. I don't know exactly when it happened, but as I grew in Christ, I learned to pray for people and their problems. I couldn't fix things for my friends but Christ could. As I prayed with my friends, I learned more about how to pray for them. The next three columns will cover some insights that may be helpful in praying for our friends. (Nancy Landahl, Copyright 2008, all rights reserved.)
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As a single woman, I have gone through many transitions since I first came to know Jesus Christ as my Savior during my sophomore year of college. Campus college groups helped me to grow spiritually and friendships developed that still endure after 35 years. Friendships ebb and flow over time but during the years that I have become isolated either by choice or circumstances, my walk with Christ has also been affected.
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I have seen God use times of isolation to deepen my dependence on Him, but I have also withdrawn intentionally from friendships when I was hurt and in need. One of the things that I have learned in my walk with Christ is that I cannot live in a vacuum. Christ intends for me to be in relationships with people. Some of these develop at work, some through Bible Studies and some God just seems to set in place. This column will explore some of the dimensions of friendship. It is not a manual for friendships or a scientific analysis. It is simply observations about friendship and how God may work in friendships to help us to grow. I hope that some of these observations may inspire others in their friendships as well. |
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About Nancy |
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Nancy Landahl has a Master's Degree in Accounting, a Bachelor's in Biology and is also a CPA. She has been a manager in a Fortune 50 oil and gas company, a consultant involved in business process transformation, and a writer for consulting firms. During the last decade or so, Nancy, who is single, became the caregiver for her mother. They shared a home in Richmond, Texas until her mother passed away in 2001. Nancy enjoys the company of Pippin and Meridoc, her two active and energetic cats. She is active in Grace Community Bible Church in several ways. She leads a woman's small group Bible study, works part time as a business administrator, and has worked with her Pastor to help ministry teams. Her personal ministry is intercessory prayer. Nancy's personal testimony of faith follows: "As a freshman at Colorado State University in 1969 I felt alienated and alone. I saw the world as a meaningless "rat-race." (You get up each morning to go to work to pay the bills so that you can eat and sleep and get up each morning to go to work...) The sixties were also a time of turmoil, with anti-war protestors, "flower-children," communes and drugs. I knew I needed a reason to live and a purpose to fulfill, but I didn't find it during that year. In my sophomore year I was in a co-ed dormitory and met some Christians who invited me to go to church with them. Pastor Siemens taught the college class and also preached the sermon. As I listened to him in the college class I thought: "I don't like this man and I don't like his teaching; he's patronizing." The morning service didn't touch my heart either. I went back in the evening because the church served students a hot meal-the dormitory food was just sandwiches. I remember Pastor Siemens teaching about "children of the darkness and children of the light" and I knew I wanted to be in the light. At the invitation to come to the altar to pray, I went forward and prayed with a deacon to receive Christ as my personal savior. I was baptized soon after that and began to grow spiritually through the church teachings and Bible studies. More than 35 years have passed since I accepted Christ, and I am still on the journey of faith." |
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